For the past few years, I feel like I've been learning a lot from evey single experience I've had, good or bad. Some were learnt the hard way but they helped me to grow a lot as a person. I feel like I'm finally myself again and since I'm celebrating another birthday today, I wanted to share some of those things that make me feel...well, a little wiser.
I'm only sharing 15 cuz I feel like this is going to be one long post to read...
1. It is better to have a few good and true friends than many fake ones. I was never the kind of person who had way too many friends but, some of those "friends" were actually very fake people. The kind of people who would talk behind your back, people who would tell you what you wanna hear just to be accepted. Then I just decided to let that people go, I don't need that kind of negativity in my life and there was no reason for me to feel tied to them. Now, even tho I can count my friends on one hand (or two!), I know they are real friends who will tell me if I'm wrong, who will encourage me to do great things and always be better. And also, people I admire and who always inspire me.
2. There is no need to rush, things will happen when they are meant to happen. I'm the kind of person who would worry so much about things not happening when I wanted them to happen or when I thought they were supposed to happen. Like yeah, there are so many things I wish I had at this point in my life but, I've learned that you just gotta let things flow and work for what you want and they will happen. The more you want to force them, the less they will happen. There's nothing bad with daydreaming a little too tho~
3. Being alone doesn't mean you're lonely. I'm not sure how to explain this but it took me a while to understand that it's ok to be alone every now and then and it doesn't mean you're lonely. Dealing with the idea of being on my own wasn't exactly my favorite but with time I became a lot more independent. I love to have people I love around me but in the end, I know I can't depend on them 100%.
4. It's ok to be sad. There was a time in my life when I was always happy, no matter what happened, I always smiled and pretended everything was just fine but, once I couldn't do that anymore, I exploded and had what I like to call an emotional breakdown. I was feeling so sad and down all the time, I didn't find the things I love exciting anymore and I felt people around me expected me to just move on and be the same, old happy Mon they knew. It was a scary feeling. It took me forever to feel myself again but I also learned that, you don't need to have a miserable life to feel sad, and it's only human to cry, feel blue and let it all out. You can take your time to understand and deal with those emotions but, you can't be stuck there forever. Only you can choose to feel better.
5. Hold the vision, trust the process. A friend told me this years ago, and I have to say it's my favorite. I do believe that if you want something with all your heart (as cheesy as it sounds) and you never lose that idea, that vision, it will come true eventually. Of course you gotta work for it and make an effort. It doesn't matter if it takes many detours, it will come to you. ♡
6. Letting go is one of the hardest things to do but it does set you free. And I'm talking about letting go of many things here: certain feelings, things, people, a job that oesn't make you happy, etc... I'm a very apprehensive person but last year I decided to start letting go. It is a long process and it's scary most of the time but, it'll make you feel better eventually. I'm still working on it tho, but I think I'm improving.
7. Believe in yourself. This is still in process but, I'm getting there. Even if it's about the small things, I want to believe I can. I can do whatever I decide to do and, I deserve great things.
8. Dream big but, make it happen. It's easy to dream and want things but the important and exciting part is, what are you going to do to make it happen? You gotta work hard to get what you dream. It's great to get some help in the way but it won't always be like that so, work for it yourself!
9. Things do happen for a reason. Even if I don't like the way some things are, I do believe they happen to make us stronger and learn from it. Sometimes we have to reach bottom to realize we need a change.
10. It's ok to think of yourself first. I can't say I don't have a conflict here anymore cuz I do, especially when it comes to my family. I always think about them first, what they want or need. But even tho they will always be my #1 I know I have to think of me too, my needs and plans.
11. It's not your job to make everyone happy. For some reason, I spent a big part of my life trying to solve everyone's problems, finding ways to fix things that were not even supposed to be part of my problems. Giving people what they needed to achieve certain things and even sacrificed part of what I wanted to do for others. I kinda assumed that "job". With time I realized I can't please everyone, I can't fix people's lives and dreams because...it's exhausting! Of course I'll help as much as I can but I won't take every single problem or situation as if it was mine.
12. Only YOU can change your life. I was always used to depend on others, always wanted help and wanted to feel protected from my own problems until I had to face them alone. That's when I realize I can't depend on people to change my life, only my choices and actions will help me to get to a better place. I know I have awesome people around me to support me or guide me but, in the end is up to me how to use that help or follow advices.
13. Do what you love, who cares what others think? Some people will always say "you're too young/to old" to do a certain thing, act in a certain way or like certain things. I admit it, I'm way too childish and some people may think it is wrong but, who cares? It is my life and as long as I'm taking care of my "adult things" in a responsible way, I can be or like whatever I want.
There's no book that says you should get married at a certain age, have children, stop dressing up, blah blah blah~ I'll do whatever makes me happy.
14. It's ok to say NO when you feel like it. I still find it hard to say "no", especially when it comes to work related stuff. But I think I'm getting better at it on the personal field(?). I don't hang around people I don't want in my life, I don't go somewhere if I don't feel like it and I don't do things if I just don't want to. I know I'm not the first or last one to do it and, as long as I'm not hurting anyone, it's ok.
15. Do everything with love.
I'll stop here, hehe. These are only a few things I've learned so far. If you made it to the end, big yay! And thanks. I know there's still a lot for me to learn on this journey called life.
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